The Slightly odd Adventures of Rurouni plushies!
by Chibi-Tenken
Summary: Currently on hiatus because I don't care about writing it very much. P: Sorry to fans. Not that there are any. Ahaha..
1. One, How to eat Octopus sushi

The Slightly-odd Adventures of Rurouni-plushies:

One: How to eat octopus sushi, and other pure, forgiving foods...

Kagi's Note: Okay, while on AIM with Mimi(my sister), I thought of these funny things..but y'know, I had to edit them...so, I don't know..just..remember..I'm crazy-ish..

This is like some toher non-published series I did, but y'know, they are just..there, and just experience the events.. only not really any epic battles, this is more of a "daily-life", if you will..it's also more of a narrative, with less talking..-"Yes..it's wierd I know, but please try to enjoy it..Also! Please forgive this one's awful mistakes in grammar if it doesn't sound right at times!

Start!

It was a special, special day and Soujiro plushie smiled.....as usual, but not his everyday smile, nooo, this was a special smile, smiled only for a reason of great smile-worthy accomplishment. For, in front of him, and in his hands, is a tray containing four octopus sushi. These are special Sushi, made by Soujiro-plushie himself. He smiles more, and sets the tray on a low table. Kenshin-plushie emerges from his room, as he has just awoken, and wishes for food now. Because, if plushies can make sushi, then they must be able to eat food..

And thus, Soujirou-plushie beckons him to try these awesome octopus sushi, and, since they were not made by Kaoru-plushie, Kenshin-plushie goes 'Ah well', and decides to try these. Soujirou-plushie and Kenshin-plushie proceed to sit happily on the floor, and eat the sushi...

BUT OH NO!!

Kenshin's octopus hasn't been all the way killed, and he turns green as the tentacle wriggles in front of his face..

Soujirou-plushie shudders, and looks away, disgusted, and Kenshin retreats to the kitchen, to murder his half-dead prey, with the Battousai-look on his face..

And thus, Soujirou pushes his sushi away after staring at it intently to see if it moved, and, by some paranoid hallucination, it did...O.o..

And from this action, the poor octopus sushi felt un-loved...

And thus, Sano-plushie quickly comes to the scene and devoures the once-un-loved sushi..

He thinks it is quite tasty, and the sushi cries for joy in his gambling, half-starved belly..

And now, Kenshin -plushie comes back, with his mouth full of the octopus tentacle, and, seeing some hanging out, slurps the rest like a noodle, thus causing everyone to stare at him, quite appalled..

Kenshin-plushie sees this, and smiles diarmingly, and sits back down, chewing the rest.

Soujirou-plushie cannot take anymore, and retires to his plushie room, where he reads plushie books.

Sano-plushie nudges Kenshin-plushies ribs at the Tenken's cowardice, thus causing half the tentacle to come back out, and Sano-plushie laughs hysterically, while Kenshin plushie turns green and goes to the bathroom, because y'know, having to try and eat something three times is too much, even for a Battousai plushie, who has seen lots of plushie-gore..

Upon hearing Kenshin-plushies frantic steps toward the bathroom, Soujirou-plushie peeks out into the hall, and sees Sano-plushie, throwing dice into the air, because he is bored at his friends' cowardice..

Soujirou-plushie then gets an evil idea, so evil, it's like he was the Tenken-killer again.........I mean, this is 'Oh my Gawd-Evil' here people! He walks back into his room, and from a box, pulls out a Katana---

He hides it behind his back and approaches Sano-plushie. Sano-plushie wonders what the heck is behind Soujirou-plushie, and he leans to one side, still tossing his dice in the air. He sees the sword too late!

slashclatterroll

Tenken Soujirou-plushie moves so fast, and before Sano-plushie knows it, his dice are split cleanly in half....thus causing smoky-white souls to rise up into the roof, and then, into the sky...

And thus, Sano-plushie breaks into tears, and clutches the half-dice in his hands, for the dice were his friends. Soujirou-plushie sees his distress, and comforts him by patting him on the back, and showing him an educational slide-show, full of facts about how gambling dice have assisted in loss of money, poor managing skills, and numerous drive-by shootings...

Sano-plushie is shocked, and throws his dice on the floor as if they were tiny , now-triangular snakes..

Soujirou-plushie knods his head intelligently, for yes, they were evil things...like Joof, who is irrelevant to this storyline..

Sano-plushie raises his hand to his forehead, falls to the floor, fainted, this was all so sudden, all TOO sudden, he just learned his friends, the dice, were a race of killers..and Kenshin-plushie can't stand three-time attempted sushi..his friends were dropping like tiny flies down a ravine..Kenshin-plushie just then emerges from the bathroom, looking just dandy again, and he appraches his friends, and sees Sano on the floor, the dice in half, and Soujirou-plushie with a sword in his hand....(and a slide-show screen, which was also irrelevant to the story, sorry to interrupt, go on..v)

Thinking the worst of the situation, he grows sick again, and rushes back to the bathroom, only to find that Hiko-plushie has occupied it, for it was morning, and he had to put on his cape just right..because otherwise it ruined Hiko-plushie's whole day!

Kenshin-plushie fantically searches around, and realizes in his panic, that there was no blood. Instantly his ache goes away, and he is just dandy again..He then approaches the kitchen, for he is now hungry again, and sees a terrible sight!!

Gasp clash OH NO

Kaoru-plushie was chopping carrots!!

............You know what that means right?!?

It means she was going to cook a dinner!! Kaoru-plushie drops the knife, like a murderer dropping a gun, and stares at Kenshin-plushie with a 'on-no-I-was-caught-in-the-act!' look...

Kenshin plushie then gives her the 'shame fingers', which is when you brush one forefinger with the other.......thus causing Kaoru-plushie to hang her head, in remeberance of last time, when her cooking poisoned the STRONGEST of the stomachs, Hiko-plushie's, and from then on, she was not allowed to cook until she went to cooking school in Germany...Harusame-plushie constantly begs Kaoru-plushie to go, but Kaoru-plushie insists she cannot leave her beloved friends behind.

PHFT! At this, Harusame-plushie usually scoffs with disgust...

And then, at that moment when Kenshin-plushie was scolding Kaoru-plushie, Harusame-plushie walks in, as if on cue..O.o..She begins to gather eggs and imported chocolate, and other cooking things..and stirs the contents and put them into an oven, and they begin to bake right in front of Kaoru-plushie...to add insult to umm..shame..THUS CAUSING KAORU-PLUSHIE TO FLUSH RED AND PICK UP THE KNIFE AND ATTEMPT TO CHOP HARUSAME-PLUSHIE'S BROWNIES INTO LITTLE TINY BITE-SIZED-BUT-HALF-COOKED PIECES!!

AND THUS A SLIGHTLY-EPIC-BATTLE-OF-BLIND FURY-VERSUS-BAKED-GOODS BEGINS!!

Kaoru-plushie charges at Harusame-plushie's defenseless brownies but is quickly interrupted by Sano-plushie! He runs in and pleads Kaoru-plushie not to destroy the tasty brownies, because they didn't do anything wrong, and he doesn't want her to turn into an evil being just like his friends, the dice, were.

And Kaoru-plushie stares at him and stops her angry attack, and realizes she almost did wrong, and, while the emotional background music begins to waft through the air, she puts the knife down and hugs the warm, fresh-out-of-the-oven brownies, and looks to Harusame-plushie. Harusame-plushie nods her head, and Kaoru-plushie beams, and stuffs one of the brownies into her mouth. The brownie-plushie is forgiving, and pats her esophagus forgivingly as it travels down to her belly. Kaoru-plushie then gets up, and proceeds to hug each chopped carrot piece, as she puts them back in the ice-box-plushie..

.....And Kenshin-plushie sighs, because the only thing worse than a Kaoru-plushie who can't cook, is a Kaoru-plushie who can't cook so bad, that she feels remorse for food she's chopped in half...

Sano-plushie walks in again, for he had to flee the scene of his pathetic pleads in an attempt to someone he despises, and laughs...

Yahiko-plushie walks in and stares at the other plushies sadly, for he has awoken too late to eat the fabled octopus sushi of Soujiro-plushie...but smiles again at the scent of brownies, and stares innocently at the brownies until Kenshin-plushie sighs and retrieves one for lazy, lazy Yahiko-plushie.

Hiko-plushie just then walks in, putting the finishing touches on his cape, fussing with its position on his shoulders, and then, being content, closes his eyes and twirls around showing the beauty and happiness a cape can give a plushie...

But then! Hiko-plushie stops in mid-twirl because he wonders why no-one gasps at him like they usually do...

AND HE SEES A HORRIBLE SIGHT!!

All the plushies are eating brownies and there in only one left for him!! Hiko-plushies worries inwardly how he will drink his sake without the aid of at least five of these delicious morsels, and, while walking up to get the last one before anyone else does, his hands feels a sharp ting of pain!

As if by reflex, Hiko-plushie draws a sword from under his beautiful cape, and slashes at the foe, only to realize that it was Soujiro-plushie's own sword with the brownie pieced through it, and he grows angry at this smaller plushie! Such NERVE to take away the last brownie from someone who vaguely helped in his redemption!

Soujiro-plushie's eyes widen at this fury of a forty-year-old-man..he shrinks back and in a desperate action of hope, breaks the brownie in two, and offers one half to Hiko-plushie...He smiles his most pathetic smile, the one that makes even the most well-cared for plushies look like unloved orphans.

Hiko-plushie looks for a moment and feels pity for the poor little once-Tenken..and he immediately pushes the piece back to Soujiro-plushie, and puts one arm around Soujiro-plushie's shoulders, thus showing that he has accepted Soujiro-plushie as a son-he-never-had...and while Soujiro-plushies sheds a fake outward tear of acceptance he inwardly cackles, for Hiko-plushie is the most athoritive looking figure in the world, and gets lots of stuff done for him..

AND THUS!

Harusame-plushie swells with pride, for it was she who taught Soujiro-plushie that look...

Kenshin-plushie sheds a tear, for Hiko-plushie never showed him such fatherly love...

Kaoru-plushie is too busy telling the carrot-pieces a bed-time story to notice...

And Sano-plushie quickly sketches the look, so that he may use it when he goes to the Akabeko to eat, perhaps this look will get him free food...

Yahiko-plushie rolls his eyes, and stuffs the rest of his brownie into his mouth...

Hiko-plushie shrugs them off, and tells his new-found son a secret to Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu..........and to never drink and drive...

The End!

Remember....Never trust dice!


	2. Two, How to Bet on your friend's fight

The un-censored Stories of Rurouni Plushies

Two: How to freely express murderous thoughts through body-language..

Kagi's Note: Okay, because I wrote these three first chapters(yes there is another one after this) at the same time basically, I didn't get any feedback that they suck, so!! I think the ideas are funny, but the Writing and Grammar seem a little off sometimes, so sometimes I think they suck as I'm editing them , but they really don't, right?(pathetic orphan-smile)

Start

It was a kinda rainy day, and all the plushies were sitting around in boredom, reading, writing, sleeping, ect. ect.

JUST THEN! Soujiro-plushie jumps down and walks around in circles, slashing his Kikuichimonji-norimune-plushie-sword in the air..Getting another evil idea, Soujiro plushie stares intently at the other plushies...

SUDDENLY! He sees Saitou-plushie smoking..Soujiro-plushie gasps, rasing his hands to his mouth in shock and smacks the cigarette out of Saitou plushie's mouth. Soujiro plushie then proceeds to scold Saitou plushie, giving him the 'shame-fingers', in which he brushes one index finger with the other, and shows him an educational slide-show, full of facts about how Cigarettes have aided in mass loss of money, poor respiratory health, and numerous deaths of innocent brownies. Saitou plushie gives him a 'what-the-heck' look...thus causing Hiko-plushie, who was drinking sake-plushie, to laugh hysterically at this face, thus causing sake to spurt out of his nose.

OH NO!!

A sake-plushie-drop lands on Sano-plushie's shoe, and Sano plushie gives the sake-plushie-drop a 'what-the-heck' look. He then glares at Hiko-plushie, but Hiko-plushie chuckles and points to Saitou-plushie. Sano-plushie glares and punches his fists together in a "I'm gonna kick your arse" way, because not only is Saitou-plushie his nemesis, but he also interrupted Sano-plushie's poety writing, which is hard enough to write already.

Sano-plushie walks up to Saitou-plushie, and taps him on the shoulder. Saitou-plushie turns his boredom from Soujiro-plushie's goody-two-shoes-no-smoke-lecture to sense who touched him. Saitou-plushie realizes who it is, smirks, and is blissfully content to let his reflexes go ahead and punch Sano-plushie in the face next time he taps him. Which he does..Ouch..

Sano-plushie recoils at the force of the blow, steadies himself, spits, and wipes plushie-blood from the corner of his mouth. His face darkens with dispise and his dagger-like-glare burns and flares, searing into Saitou-plushie's back, demanding Saitou-plushie's attention and apology. Saitou-plushie smirks and sideglances at Sano-plushie, who now charges with fist enclosed, to return the blow. Saitou-plushie turns to face him in time to catch the fist, and crush the knuckles, still smirking at Sano-plushie's suprised and widened eyes.

SO NOW YOU PROBABLY SENSE AN EPIC BATTLE OF COOL-ARROGANCE-VERSUS-NOBLE-AND-AWESOME-POWER!!

Sano-plushie steps back, trashing around to tear his fist from Saitou-plushie's grasp. He frees himself and shakes his hand around, flexing the fingers to see if they still move. He then glares at Saitou-plushie and charges with both fists clenched and hits Saitou-plushie in the stomach and chest, causing Saitou-plushie to fly backwards into the wall next to Soujiro-plushie.

Soujiro-plushie's mouth drops at the trouble he indirectly caused, and runs to Kenshin-plushie, shaking him awake. Kenshin-plushie sleepily glances at Soujiro-plushie, listening to his harried voice. Soujiro-plushie sees none of his words are reaching Kenshin-plushie, and he then grabs Kenshin-plushie's head and turns it in the direction of the fight. Kenshin looks through half-lidded eyes and sees the fight. Instantly he asseses the situation and gets up, nodding to Soujiro-plushie. Soujiro-plushie sees this, and sighs of relief. Kenshin-plushie steps over Saitou-plushie's crouched and angered figure, and cooly walks into the kitchen. Soujiro-plushie proceeds to wake the others, and they in turn watch the fight with growing fear and interest.

Soujiro-plushie stands near the couch, and waits impatiently for Kenshin-plushie to come back. Kenshin-plushie then arrives, carrying a hefty box of popcorn, and some smaller bowls. He then offers the others bowls of pocorn, and retires to the couch to watch this Epic Fight like a movie, because y'know, he was bored.. Soujiro-plushie is frustrated with Kenshin-plushie's non-chalant attitude toward this fight, and gives up wondering why he didn't stop it. Soujiro-plushie gives an exasperated sigh, and sits back down on the couch next to Kenshin-plushie, and eats the popcorn.

The EPIC FIGHT ensues, with many punches and kicks, and also some more crashes into the wall..with the every now-and-then gasp, or grimace from the audience, Kenshin-plushie then looks to Soujiro-plushie, and they both nod in agreement. A fight like this should definetely have a bet on it!

AND SO! Soujiro-plushie bets three dollar-plushies that Saitou-plushie will win, and Kenshin-plushie bets three dollar-plushies that Sano-plushie will win. And they shook on it, and everything was pretty good. Except from the fighters point of view, of course.

Saitou-plushie was now, officially, and finally, angered..Sano-plushie was like one of those stupid bugs you step on and step on, but they never seem to die, they always pop up when you think they're dead an' then they scare the heck outta you..Saitou-plushie wasn't scared though, he was annoyed. He was very annoyed. In fact, Saitou-plushie was so annoyed, that if he baked a pie with his feelings, and you ate it, it'd kill you with all the bad karma it had. That's how annoyed he was. Sano-plushie, on the other hand, was feeling more powerful and invincible with each mind-numbing punch. Maybe that was why... But anyways, if he baked a pie with his feelings, it'd be flexing it's muscles all the way down your esophagus, and, if you were REALLY unlucky, it accidentally clog your throat.

After many punches, the internal bleeding finally got to Sano-plushie, and Saitou-plushie was able to pin him down! Now was the time for a really cool finishing move. Saitou-plushie felt accomplished, and smirked coldly in Sano-plushie's face, relishing the moment.

Sano-plushie had realized he was on the losing end of the battle about when he couldn't move his left hand, but for some strange and inexplicable reason, he had chosen to keep on fighting. That is, until Saitou-plushie pinned him down and smirked in his face. Sano-plushie was then enraged, and he shot another dagger-glare at Saitou-plushie. Saitou-plushie's head recoiled, that was one mean look! And a look so mean should ALWAYS be sliced in half and fed to a meaner look, and Saitou-plushie was not one to back down. SO THUS! Glares and smriks reeled back and forth in this silent battle of mean looks.

Soujiro-plushie was bored again. All these cocky plushies seemed to be doing was intimidating the other with mean looks. He then nudged Kenshin-plushie, and they both agreed to cheer them on with chants of 'Fight!Fight!Fight!' like this EPIC BATTLE was some sort of school brawl. But I guess it worked, because SANO-PLUSHIE THREW SAITOU-PLUSHIE OFF HIM AND THEY BEGAN TO CIRCLE EACH OTHER!!!

Sano-plushie decided to quit stalling, and threw a punch at Saitou-plushie, who dodged with ease and kicked him down. Sano-plushie fell to the floor, and rolled aside to kick Saitou-plushie's ankles, which caused him to fall down too. Saitou-plushie saw he was in trouble, and was sorry he didn't break Sano-plushie's legs as well as his left hand. But it was too late for regrets. Sano-plushie had Saitou-plushie pinned down and was staring at him with a triumphant, yet hateful, glare. He proceeded to raise his right hand, and was prepared to smash it in Saitou-plushie's smirky face WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN-----!!

Saitou-plushie screamed. He screamed just like Kaoru-plushie. It was weird, BUT--!!It was not because he was afraid, of course, I mean, since when does Saitou-plushie become fearful?! Never, that's when. He had a plan, and of course, it worked. Sano-plushie shrunk back in suprise at this scream, which gave Saitou-plushie enough time to turn the tables, and pin Sano-plushie down and he proceeded to raise his fist like Sano-plushie had earlier, and he smirked, happy to deliver the final blow.

Sano-plushie saw this was the end, and he cringed, ready for his extra-violent, yet malnourishing face-punch. He was just wondering who would stitch his wounds(He hoped it was not Megumi-plushie) and how much it would cost to have eye-transplants, WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN----!!

A growl emitted from Saitou-plushie. It was not a wolf-growl either. It was a stomach growl, that warns you that the stomach is hungry, and if you don't feed it plushie-food soon, it will eat you. An eerie silence followed this growl, and Saitou-plushie got up in the midst, kicked Sano-plushie in his plushie-ribs, and walked away.

Saitou-plushie then went into the kitchen, and made more popcorn.

Sano-plushie got up, regardless of his wounds, and managed to flip Saitou-plushie off, before he collapsed on Saitou-plushie's popcorn, bleeding over it so Saitou-plushie would starve some more.

Saitou-plushie cringed, and gave him a 'what-the-heck' look, and walked away again. Megumi-plushie rushed in, and began to treat Sano-plushie for 200 yen per hour, which Kaoru-plushie would have to pay..... Kenshin-plushie and Soujiro-plushie stalked away, as if they had just seen a bad movie, and sighed. That was because their bet was cancelled, the fight never finished, BUT NEXT TIME!! They would make sure that both fighters were full and content.

The End!!

Remember...never do the 'what-the-heck' look in front of Hiko-plushie while he's drinking Sake-plushie.


	3. Three, How to save Christmas

The uncensored Stories of Rurouni Plushie, #3

Christmas Special!

Beginning Note: Uhh..it's a Christmas Special.. Because I'm reaaally bored before Christmas. But I'm putting it here after Christmas, so did you really havta know that? Probably not.. Once upon a time, in a faraway, made-up land, there was a city. This city was called Whoville-I MEAN-Little-Plusie-Tokyo...sweatdrop Little-Plushie-Tokyo was fairly large for a plushie-city, for it was a plushie-parody of a big city that resides in the wonderful country of Japan. Yes, and in Little-Plushie-Tokyo, there lived some plushies. But not just ANY plushies. Why would I write about just ANY plushies? No, they were plushies that had two good things going for them; One, they were fashioned after the OH-SO-EPIC Rurouni Kenshin characters, who are SO good for the soul, if you baked a pie with them(Kami-sama forbid) and ate it before you died, you'd go to Heaven for sure. There was also one made-up-one that was not-so-epic-but-still-good-for-the-soul....Two, they were ALSO special plushies because they celebrated Christmas, not with Holiday Attire(as is usual for normal plushies), but they celebrated it with a whole little play, full of comfortably random scenes.

Soujiro-plushie was nervous..oh-so-nervous. He thought this play rocked..it was such an well-loved storyline...He thought his part was scary..it was such an embarassing part..he thought bad things about Christmas-time..

..BUT ALL OF A SUDDEN! He changed his mind, because he somehow knew that Santa Claus-plushie was watching...

How did he know? Well, it was obvious...Santa Claus-plushie was sitting in the front row and staring cynically at the stage....

Soujiro-plushie shivered at this "Jolly" old plushie-man's look, that cyncial, distrusting look he had not seen once since this morning when Harusame-plushie glared at the Hiko-plushie for handing her a tasty-looking breakfast..

Harusame plushie was annoyed...oh-so-annoyed. She thought this play sucked..it was such an over-used storyline..She thought her part sucked..it was such a small part..she stared cruelly at the audience from behind a curtain...

..BUT ALL OF THE SUDDEN! She saw Kenshin-plushie and smiled, because she knew she had to make him happy...

Why did she have to make him happy? Well, it was obvious..Kenshin-plushie was giving her the paycheck...

Harusame-plushie shot daggers at his back when he turned to go out and greet the audience...

Kenshin-plushie was happy..oh-so-happy. He thought his play would go well..it taught such a valuable lesson..he thought his part rocked..he was so used to playing this part in people's lives...he greeted the audience warmly, and noticed the Santa Claus-plushie man in the front row...

How did he notice? Well, it was obvious..this is Kenshin-plushie for Kenshin-plushie's sake!

Kenshin-plushie studied this jolly man's aura and left the stage to open the curtains....

The curtains-plushies opened to a stage, that resembled Santa's workshop-plushie...but the names will not have plushie after them for quicker typing reasons that will remain unknown..

Actor-who-plays-Santa: Hohoho...make more toys elves!

Actors-who-play-elves: Yes Santa..all bow to Santa..we obey Santa..

Actor-who-plays-Santa: Chief Elf! I command thee to tell me the toy report!

Actor-who-plays-ChiefElf:(voice strangely like Soujiro's) uhh...all good Santa-sama..

Actor-who-plays-Santa: Fufuf-HOHOHO! And the reindeer?

Soujiro-who-play-CheifElf: (sigh) all good Santa-sama..

Actor-who-plays-Santa: Good..now nothing will stop me from taking over Japa-I MEAN HOHOHO!!Good..now nothing will stop me from giving toys to those good little children..

Soujiro-who-plays-ChiefElf: Except the weather..

Actor-who-plays-Santa: MUAHAHA-WHAT?!?..uh I mean Hohoho-what..of course..

Soujiro-who-plays-CheifElf: The weather is being controlled by an evil diety...you can't fly in that weather, your good-ness will be shredded to pieces..

Actor-who-plays-Santa: IT WASN'T ME!!O.o..uhh OH NO!! Now those sweet little kids will have nothing to reward their disgustingly good behavior!

Soujiro-who-plays-CheifElf: It gets worse! Someone broke your leg!

Actor-who-plays-Santa: (looks down) HOW COULD I HAVE MISSED THAT?!?! I CANNOT BELIEVE I DID NOT FEEL A KATANA SLASHING THROUGH MY WOODEN-STAGE-LEG-plushie THAT MAKES ME TALLER!

Soujiro-who-plays-ChiefElf: (fake sob) Those children! If only there were someone who could slay the evil and deliver those presents! WHAT WILL WE DO SANTA!?(shakes Santa-actor)WHAT-----WILL------WE -------DO!?!?

(CRASH THROUGH THE WALL!!)

????: I can deliver those presents! And I can supplement the death of evil with a REALLY stern lecture!

Audience:(claps)

????: (blush) Now, now, is there really need to clap and further upstage these characters?

Audience: (claps more)

????: Aww..I love you guys..NOW! BACK TO ACTING!

Actor-who-plays-Santa: And who might you be, you sick, sick goody-two-shoes?O.o I mean, you wonderful man..Hohoho..

Soujiro-who-play-CheifElf: (squeaky elf-voice) WE ARE SAVED!!(looks at Kenshin-plushie, who gives hima secret thumbs-up, which means his paycheck has been raised)

Actor-who-plays-Santa: You sicko..ERR!!HOHOHO!! What will you do about the presents?

Kenshin-who-plays-Kenshin: I will use your sleigh to ride around and do your job!

Soujiro-who-plays-CheifElf: (more squeaky voice) What will you do about the evil diety?

Kenshin-who-plays-Kenshin: Raise your paycheck!O.oI MEAN! EASY! I know who the deity is so I can solve this quickly!

Soujiro-who-plays-CheifElf: Who?

Kenshin-who-plays-Kenshin: IT'S HIM!!(Points to actor-who-plays Santa) THAT MAN IS REALLY SHISHIO-PLUSHIE! HE HAS COME TO RUIN CHRISTMAS!!

Shishio-who-played-Santa: (tears off Santa-suit to reveal his true bandaged-form) YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE!(grabs onto hanging garland and swings around room) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Kenshin-who-plays-Kenshin: NOT SO FAST SHISHIO!!(grabs another hanging garland and swings around, following Shishio)

THE EPIC BATTLE OF GOOD VS. EVIL HAS BEGUN!!

(The plushies swing around, never gaining or losing distance, and, seeing this dilemma, Kenshin-plushie runs faster, closing the distance.dun dun DUN

Shishio-plushie sees this, and jumps down and grabs a Katana hidden in his Santa-suit on the floor. The Audience gasps! Kenshin-plushie also jumps down and grabs his Sakabatou..

Their Katanas clash with dramatic sound effects and they glare intently at one another)

ONLY TO BE INTERRUPTED!!

Actor-who-plays-Mrs.Claus: (runs into room horrified) NOOO!! I WAS IN LOVE WITH A FRAUD!?!(runs toward them and trips on skirts. She falls to the floor and sobs uncontrollably) I CAN'T BELIEVE I WAS LIED TOOOOOO!!!!!(sob)

Everyone: (stares)

Actor-who-plays-CynicalElf: pfh.. What a baby..

Soujiro-who-plays-CheifElf: (pats Mrs.Claus' shoulder) There there ma'am, I'm sure he's just going through a mid-life crisis, and will be back before noon...

Harusame-who-obviously-plays-CynicalElf: It's already one "Chief"...

Soujiro-who-plays-ChiefElf: Oops..

Actor-who-plays-Mrs.Claus: (sob more)

Soujiro-who-plays-Chief-elf: O.o..listen..it's just a play..you don't need to REALLY cry...right?

Actor-who-plays-Mrs.Claus: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT!?!(sobs)

Harusame-who-plays-cynicalelf: (rolls eyes) Oh now, this is getting ridiculous...

Actor-who-plays-Mrs.Claus: (turns to Haru-elf) HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT!?!?I loved Santa and this is not Santa!Do you know what that feels like?!?cries

Harusame-who-plays-cynicalelf: No, no I don't know what that feels like...how could I? Mrs.Claus, I just make the toys...I have a purpose in life..make your own you baby..pfh

Actor-who-plays-Mrs.Claus: You are right..I WILL MAKE A PURPOSE!!I WILL!!(stands up) GRAR!! I'M GONNA BEAT THE EVIL OUTTA THIS IMPOSTER!!!approaches Shishio Say your prayers you jolly sicko...

Shishio-who-now-plays-Shishio: O.o

Kenshin-who-plays-Kenshin: HEY WAIT! THAT'S MY JOB!!

Shishio-who-now-plays-Shishio: N-now Yumi, you DO know that this is a play...?

Yumi-who-plays-Mrs.Claus: Be quiet...(rasies fist)

Soujiro-who-plays-CheifElf: OH NO! I HATE THIS PLAY!

Kenshin-who-plays-Kenshin: YOU DUMB GIRL! THAT'S MY LINE!

Harusame-who-plays-cyncialelf: pfh I told you this storyline would never work...

Shishio-who-now-plays-Shishio: GREAT! STUPID BATTOUSAI RESURRECTED ME AND YUMI SO I COULD DIE AGAIN?!

Santa-plushie: HohoNO!! Stop this!!(climbs onto stage)

Soujiro-who-plays-Chiefelf: BACK OFF JOLLY-MAN!I DIDN'T WANT HIM TO COME BACK ANYWAYS!In order to save Shishio-san's life, you'll have to go through me..(grabs Candy cane-plushie)

Harusame-who-plays-cynicalelf: O.OWoah there Soujiro! At least let me go call Santa's insurance...

(violent plushie fight ensues with lots of candy canes, and children yelling and placing bets while the moms and dad-plushies look on horrified)

..............................fade out..................................

Harusame-plushie: And that's how none of us got Chrismtas Presents that year...

Yumi-plushie: Well,we weren't going to get any anyways..c'mon anata..

Shishio-plushie: (is severly bandaged(can anyone tell?)) I hate you all....BOOM DIAPPEAR INTO HECK

Soujiro-plushie: I can't believe I was so rude to Santa..(sigh)

Kenshin-plushie: I can't beleive I set such an example to the children...

Harusame-plushie: I can't believe you didn't let me call his insurance Soujiro..I could have repented for my rude comments with my false regards for his safety...

Kenshin-plushie: Suck-up..

Harusame-plushie: Invincible sicko...

Kenshin-plushie:....I'm invincible? AWESOME!

Harusame-plushie:(sigh)

Soujiro-plushie: Well, at least we have each other right? That's all Christmas is really about...right?

Harusame-plushie: Stop watching those over-rated sappy Christmas specials...

Soujiro-plushie: (pats Harusame-plushie's head) Oh now..where's your Christmas spirit Harusame-plushie?

Harusame-plushie: (menacing glare) Wherever my Christmas present is...

The END! So? How are they? Good I hope..yep..reply please..


	4. Four, How to survive the rain

The Slightly-odd Adventures of Rurouni-plushies!

4: How to Avoid the Rain

Kagi-chan's note: Well.. Thank you so far minna-san(everyone)..Anou...here's the next one?

...Clouds are coming...

Sano-plushie looked up at the sky and sighed a sigh only someone completely disapointed would sigh...and indeed, he was disappointed...SO disappointed, that if he baked a cookie with his feelings, even if it was delicious, you'd feel too guilty to eat it..and if you were REALLY unlucky, all the guilt would give you suicidal felings..

But fear not, he was not disappointed at someone..he was disappointed at someTHING..

Yes my friends, Sano-plushie was disappointed at the rain-clouds..

Sano-plushie had wanted to go buy good food at the Akabeko-plushie so Kaoru-plushie would not cook, but now, no, he'd have to eat THAT cooking..

BUT THEN! Just as he turned to go in, THAT smell wafted through the air..a smell so horrible, it's like the things being burned were screaming..Sano-plushie gasped in horror at the pain, and seeing that he would soon have a similar fate, decided..what's a little rain?It's not like the rain ever hurt anyplushie...right?

Well, that's what Sano-plushie thought, and for a while, it was pretty good...the rain feel softly on the street and everything was quiet..

Sano-plushie was enjoying this rain under an umbrella when he suddenly noticed..why were the streets so empty? NOBODY was there..not even the crazy plushies that ran around with dice..Sano-plushie chuckled, remembering how foolish he once was..gambling with those cube-shaped-murderers, the dice.. AND SUDDENLY!

Sano-plushie noticed with horrified expression that a strange sloshing sound came whenever he put his foot-plushies down..

Sano-plushie turned around, determined to find out that sloshy-sound, but alas! No one was there...

Sano-plushie turned back and continued walking...

YET ONCE AGAIN! The sloshy sound started, and it followed his steps exactly..Again Sano-plushie turned, determined now to beat up whoever was annoying him, only to be disappointed at the empty street.

Now Sano-plushie was feeling uncomfortable, so he decided to experiment, just to see if it was a normal-plushie or a ghost-plushie..he hoped it was not a ghost-plushie, he was fearful of ghost-plushies...

SO THEN! Foward he walked, then backward, again it sounded. Up he hoped, and it made noise when he came down. Nothing can mimick his exact movements, so maybe it was his foot-plushies.

As if it wasn't obvious from the start, Sano-plushie looked down at his feet.

AND THERE IT WAS! Sano-plushie's feet were soggy and wet from walking in the rain. They looked like they had been through a washing machine with mud in it. Sano-plushie cursed his horrible luck at forgetting that the rain was a plushie's nightmare. He stomped all the way back home, which was hard, because the slosh of his plushie feet drowned out the stomping.

As he opened the door, he hoped noplushie would be there to see his wet feet..

But there is no good luck for Sano-plushie today is there?

Soujiro-plushie, who was playing rock-paper-scissors with Harusame-plushie looks up at the soggy sound..AND LO! He sees Sano-plushie and hopelessly tries to restrain his laughter...if it was any more hopeless, we would call it 'not-trying'..but he tried so..

Soujiro-plushie burst into laughter! And Harusame-plushie looks up at him in confusion..

Soujiro-plushie then, seeing Harusame-plushie's confusion, points to the door..

WHERE SANO-PLUSHIE IS NOT!

Harusame-plushie, in seeing nothing, turns back to a now confused Soujiro-plushie, who sits down again and apoligizes with Harusame-plushie, and insisting that there was a Sano-plushie there.

Harusame-plushie officially declares Soujiro-plushie delirious..

Unhappy with his new title, Soujiro-plushie goes around the house to find the Sano-plushie with soaked feet...

Unhappy at losing at rock-paper-scissors, Harusame-plushie hopes he finds nothing and will be so distaught that she will win the next time they play..

Unhappy with his soaked feet, Sano-plushie goes into the laundry room to try and dry his feet before someone sees...

AND SO AN EPIC RACE AGAINST TIME STARTS!

Harusame-plushie decides to work on her game stategy, and tries to foresee her fake opponent's move...

Soujiro-plushie decides that Sano-plushie would have been ashamed to have his feet wet when it was obviously raining, so outside he went with an umbrella and wooden sandals...

Sano-plushie is ashamed to have his feet wet, as of course, it was raining and he had not realized it..

so he went in the house from the back door and into the laundry room...

Harusame-plushie goes into Kenshin-plushie's room to ask his help, as he was the best at predicting moves...

Soujiro-plushie had been around the whole house and had not seen Sano-plushie..so then he decided he would be in his room, trying to dry his feet with a pathetic towel...

Sano-plushie was now in the laundry room when he realized..how is he gonna dry his feet in the dryer-plushie? He couldn't stick his whole body in..and putting his feet in would hurt his ankles terribly, so again he felt like a fool, and decided to dry his feet with a pathetic towel in his room, so up to his room he decided to go..

Harusame-plushie did not see Kenshin-plushie in his room, and decided to check the kitchen, where he also might be, because Kaoru-plushie had tried to cook again, and Kenshin-plushie would be guarding the kitchen in case she tried again today. On her way there, she saw Sano-plushie's hair behind a screen, creeping up the stairs and shook her head. Sano-plushie had so many abstract and weird fans...

Soujiro-plushie departed Sano-plushie's room, as he had not seen him, and went back into the living room. Where could Sano-plushie be? AND THEN IT HIT HIM! Sano-plushie is foolish when desparate and he would try the place where everything dryed! The laundry room! And so he rished there to find

NOBODY..Disappointed and confused, Soujiro-plushie found himself questioning his sanity once again..

Sano-plushie had just barely escaped with his dignity, for he heard Soujiro-plushie come to the laundry room seconds after he realized he could not use the laundry machine, and he had ducked into an unusually large laundry-basket. Why was Soujiro-plushie looking for him? ...OF COURSE! IT COULD ONLY BE THAT Soujiro-plushie saw him in the doorway(and so naturally he would be the one trying to find him because Soujiro-plushie had been with Harusame-plushie, and Harusame-plushie did not see him, obviously she mocked Soujiro-plushie and he was now out to clear his name..)

And indeed he was..

But Soujiro-plushie was at a loss, for both the likely places Sano-plushie would be were empty..and so he retreated to the kitchen where Harusame-plushie was listening attentively to Kenshin-plushie's teachings. He walked over to the table-plushie and took a brownie and ate it, silently thanking the brownie for feeding him. What was he to do? Sano-plushie surely would have dried his feet out wherever he was by now...

How very wrong he was...

For Sano-plushie was having a terrible time finding his pathetic rag. It was so horrible, it was like trying to find mud in the desert, which if you don't know what that is, is like trying to find a tiny bug in the forest. So you can see, it was very hard and Sano-plushie became very frustrated..

JUST THEN!

Soujiro-plushie burst into the door, for this had gone on too long, and Harusame-plushie had told him of this Sano-plushie ghost she saw...

Soujiro-plushie pushed Harusame-plushie into the room and pointed triumphantly at Sano-plushie's feet, eager to show his right-ness, only to find that Sano-plushie's feet were

COMPLETELY DRY!

As Soujiro-plushie burst into frustrated tears, Harusame-plushie sighed and patted his head, telling him it was okay to be delirious sometimes.

Sano-plushie thanked the plushie gods and went down to have some delicious rice ball-plushies, for he was tired and stressed out...it had been a horribly tiring and stressful day...

THE END!

Author's note: Okay..well..this wasn't as good as I had hoped it'd be, but it was longer than I ever dreamed it could...O.o.."" sorry for the wait, but I am happy it was not as long as the last one!


End file.
